So I rescinded my rule about not going to happy hour during the week.

That’s because Dave suggested we meet for happy hour. And happy hour with Dave is a guaranteed fun time. If by fun you mean puking your brains out the next day. But I digress.

Dave and I have been friends since college and now we live a mere ten blocks away from eachother. He is the one friend I could call in the middle of the night and confess that I was scared of the zombie apocalpyse and he’d either answer “Okay I’ll come over” or “Grow the fuck up, Ji.”

So we meet for happy hour at Blue Owl. Which is awesome. They have happy hour until midnight. And we have our usual talk about dating and relationships and what not. Dave always gives me good advice about dating. Advice that I never follow. And he also says shit like, “Well, he doesn’t deserve you, Ji” and I actually believe him when he says that because for some reason you believe those words when a guy friend tells you that than a girlfriend because guy friends are more economical in their compliments.

And he tells me about this girl he’s been seeing.

And I’m prepared to hate her.

I assume that she’s hideous and boring and annoying.

But then she shows up.

And the bitch is cute.

And not only is she cute but she is unbelievably nice. The first thing she says to me is, “Oh, I’ve heard so much about you!”

Fuck.

I begin to like her. And then we start talking as if Dave isn’t even there.

Then she goes on to remind me that we once met at a party. Really? I ask. I don’t remember. Then she tells me I don’t remember because I was too busy talking to another guy and she says, ‘I thought you were much cuter than him.”

Damn, and the bitch speaks the truth!

So I tell them that I’m tired and ready to go home. I figure that a good cock enabler lets their friend hang out with his woman. I don’t need to be the third wheel. I’d rather go home and catch a re-run of Gossip Girl. Really! Sniff.

And now I can’t help but feel a twinge of sadness. Like I’ve lost another friend to the relationship dungeon. But more important, I’ve lost a happy hour buddy.